The saviour in you, wanted to rescue.
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You felt you could change them.
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You felt you had the answers that they lacked.
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You loved passionately, rescued relentlessly, ignored the intuitive nudges that urged caution.
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‘I LOVE!’ you yelled loudly to block out the fear that something was not quite right. “There is nothing wrong with loving!”
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And so you ignored the rising resentment, the draining… oh the draining of your energy.
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You ignored the sadness and the inner turmoil.
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You kept right on rescuing.
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You got a dash of relief when they seemed to appreciate you.
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You felt needed and wanted and it almost assuaged the pain in your heart that you could not quite explain.
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But it did not last long.
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Promises made, promises broken.
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And still you continued to ‘love’.
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You stopped noticing that you were liking your self less and less because you were so caught up in ‘loving’ them.
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And now…
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Now, the bubble is burst or bursting.
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And you feel broken.
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How could you have given so much for so little and for so long?
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And the temptation is to keep rescuing, keep saving, find someone else who appreciates you more.
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Or maybe, you just want to hurt them and hurt them and hurt them for taking from you for so long and giving nothing back in return.
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I guess that either reaction means you don’t have to look inside. You can keep avoiding the wasteland inside your soul. Though I guess you are not thinking this, of course.
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YOu might still be blaming them, cursing them, hating them.
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And the pain rages on inside.
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Oh honey, it is not them.
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It is not you, either.
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This is all you have ever known so you did the best you could. You ‘loved’ the best you could.
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BUt this was not love, honey.
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It was need.
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It was expectation.
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It was boundary-less.
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And it inevitably bit you on the butt.
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Are you ready to come home to you, yet?
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Finding someone, something else to save and rescue will not cure that chaos you feel inside.
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Come home to the Divine.
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Come home to YOU!
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I can help.
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It will not always feel pretty but it does not feel all that great now, does it?
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Come do life with me in the Circle.
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It is time to awaken and come on home.
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RosemaryNonnyKnight.com/opulencecircle
