As the deer pants for the water, so my soul longs after you
From The Bible
I have always known this hunger, this thirst to go deeper into the Divine but I have ignored it.
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In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, I have ignored it.
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In taking on responsibility for everyone else’s happiness, I have ignored it.
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In trying to rescue everyone, in feeling hurt, in getting engaged in drama, I have ignored it
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And still the hunger, the thirst did not leave me.
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Something inside me, kept calling out to me.
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It yearned for something more.
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It yearned for something new.
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It yearned for the freedom to express itself.
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I tried to bury it in working harder at the wrong stuff.
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They hunger remained.
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I looked for relief in eating more chocolate.
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The hunger and thirst remained.
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I looked for it in the TV and distractions.
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Still the hunger and the thirst remained.
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I even looked for the answer in church.
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And finally, I found the courage to admit that jumping through all those hoops just added even more emptiness to me.
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There was no escaping.
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there still is no escaping the hunger and the thirst.
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And the only place I know to relieve it, is when I turn my back on the external stuff and just surrender to the Divine within.
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When I deliberately call the light to that empty place in my heart and allow it to shine brightly on me.
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It can be uncomfortable to see where I hide from myself.
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There is almost always something I did not want to see.
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But as I choose to see, I realise that I make life harder for myself by avoiding it.
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Because I come back to bliss, when I just allow myself to see.
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But then I forget again, and get caught up in being an adult.
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And adults do not have time for such fanciful thinking.
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We have stuff to do, people to look after, money to make, REAL LIFE to live.
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And the hunger, the thirst lives on under the surface.
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Eating at you.
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Draining your energy as you try to avoid looking within.
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Keeping you running around like a headless chicken, working harder to stand still.
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When will you stop running from that which you cannot run away from because you take it with you everywhere?
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When will you go within?
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When will you leave behind all the dogma and the rules about how approaching the Divine needs to look?
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And like a child, just run into your Papa’s presence and sit there, basking in the love and affection and wholeness that can only be found there?
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Come back home.
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AFFIRM WITH ME: I am home in You. I return to my Source. I am complete in You.
