I remember when my dad died…
My relationship with him had not been great and I had thought I would have some time to figure out who he was, why he did things the way he did them, get him to meet and love my husband and so on…
But then he died.
In my final year at University…
And it was so confusing.
I thought there might be relief about him leaving but actually, there was just pain, uncertainty and I did get angry with the Divine.
I remember speaking to a counsellor at this point…
Telling him how dark and depressed I felt
And how the worst of it was this feeling that the Divine should have protected me from this pain
It felt as though I would have been better not to know the Divine if I would still be subject to these pains…
I stopped going to church
I was so angry with Him…
But then I sheepishly came back because there was nowhere to go…
Who could bring me relief like He could?
Who loved me so completely like He did?
And I suppose even then I knew that He did not cause pain in my life
I just did not really understand what did, at that point…
Now, I know that whatever shows up in my life is usually a reflection of what I am thinking, feeling, expecting…
Yes, it is a big responsibility to be a God unit…
A responsibility I did not want to face up to, for a long time…
It was easier to blame the Divine
To tell myself that events were out of my control
That He gives and takes away
That He loves sometimes and other times, hides His face…
Now, again, I know you may not see the Divine in such a personal manner
You may think of Him as Universe, Source, Spirit or whatever name you give to that power you think is outside of you, controlling all the events of your life, allowing you to experience good things or keeping them from you…
As spiritual people, we know there is more to this than meets the eye
But we can sometimes believe the lie that that something bigger is out to get us or has abandoned us
The truth is, LOVE is the only real thing
And we get to choose whether we hold back from love or whether we open up to and allow love.
And that is what determines our life experiences…
The Divine never left
The Divine is ever loving you
That is a constant
How well you receive that love is always up to you.
A hard pill to swallow at times when you think you are getting everything right and jumping through all the hoops and doing all the things you think you have to do and STILL, things are not working for you.
But really most of that stuff you are doing is conditioning and based on fear.
Fear never wins.
You are more powerful than your conditioning may lead you to believe
The Divine Never Left
Where did you shut the door on love?
- Your vision is your permission.
- You are capable of your calling.
- You are much more powerful than you realise.
- Yes you can get everything you want.
- You are loved. You are enough. You are worthy. You deserve the very best of everything.
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Much Amazing Love