It took me a while to let go. I was brought up christian, well…Catholic to begin with…
But I had given up being Catholic a long time ago as there were way too many questions and I finally decided that I was the only one who would have to answer for myself on ‘judgement day’ so I better follow my own personal conviction and opt out of Catholicism.
However, it took me a good while to opt out of other more deeply held, personal Christian beliefs.
I was both scared of eternal hellfire and also, disbelieving of its reality. In theory, I could not reconcile a God of unconditional love with the deity that would put me in ETERNAL hell for a temporary mistake but at the same time, what if it was true???!!!! I thought I had better hedge my bets, just to be on the safe side.
I was also VERY scared of losing all of my friends while at the same time, realising we had less and less in common because if they KNEW what I really deep down believed they would try to cast demons out of me and they would distance themselves from me anyway. Love in the christian world is VERY dependent on you thinking the same stuff as each other all of the time. I Know this because I used to be THAT friend who would drop you like a hot potato, if you dared to backslide in any way. Only after trying to ‘love’ & pray you back into the fold, of course and only after trying very hard to convince you of the error of your ways. Ultimately, I would keep my children and myself far away from you, so that you did not infect me or mine with your disease of not believing what I did.
So many hurt ex-christians out there as everyone you built life with, is suddenly gone the moment you drop off the ‘This is how we do things’ parade – Pity.
Truth be told, I did lose all my friends, literally ALL my christian friends and seeing that I had been Christian my whole life – That was literally my WHOLE FRIEND LIST so yep, it was a very justified fear. And in some ways, who could blame them?!, I became rather vocal in my blogs about my thoughts on sex, pornography and other ‘scary’ subjects that Christians should never talk about so hey ho.
But I guess, in the end, I felt it was worth it though in lonelier moments, I did wonder if I could have just kept pretending for a while longer. Having said that, I do still love a good worship time with other people all focused on God, I just cannot align with some of the wording in the songs anymore. All the talk about sons being killed by a ‘loving’ father in order to save us lowly worms is just not something I can completely get behind anymore so that tends to turn me off somewhat (OMG, I said it!!!!)
Ultimately, I wanted God, not rules, regulations, rituals etc.
I wanted the real thing and I wanted to keep going deeper and deeper and DEEPER into my knowing of this God whereas Christianity seemed to demand that I could only go soooo deep before I had to stop, in case I got deceived by the scary ‘new age’ stuff that seemed to say exactly the same stuff as I had learnt in Christianity but with some better means of application and without all the limitation placed on God.
I open up and continue to go deeper into the Divine and who I am and I love it.
It is challenging & empowering.
It is also FREEING in ways that Christianity did not seem to be, though it promised it would be.
But yep, it takes courage to leave behind all that you once held so dear and especially when you know it is not ALL wrong for you. As I say, there are still some preachers, teachers that I learn a great deal from but I notice how they go so far and no further because of the fear of what other christians will say – Christians can be a very judgmental bunch and they are oh so vocal about how wrong and biblically deceived you must be if you do not agree with their way of seeing things or interpreting the Bible (even though accepted interpretations of the Bible change every few years or so!) – Again, I only know this because I was this.
Why do I out myself in this way?
For our collective freedom.
You already know if some of your previously, tightly held religious beliefs are hindering you.
They feel uncomfortable.
They feel stifling.
They feel limiting.
And you will not allow yourself to truly prosper while you remain in that conflicted state.
Ask the questions.
Dare to face the doubts
FREE YOURSELF from the doubts.
The truth is, you might find satisfactory answers to your questions and choose to stay put – That is Absolutely GREAT! I am not saying dump all religion, just because I said so.
What I am really saying is ‘HANDLE YOUR INNER WORLD’ because your inner conflict will ABSOLUTELY show up in your external world. Something WILL ABSOLUTELY SUFFER, be it your body, your relationships, your work, your money. Where there is inner conflict, there will be outer conflict and you will not even completely realise that it is because you are hiding your truth as you try to be what you think others want you to be.
You are too powerful to leave this stuff to chance and hope.
Free yourself from the inner conflict and in so doing, free yourself to go deeper into the Divine and to experience greater peace & plenty in your physical reality.
Be a clear vessel, my love.
Set Yourself Free.
And before you go, I am doing a free call today – You can attend from anywhere, as long as you have an internet connection, which you must have, if you are reading this.
Today, we are talking about the 7 Big Fears Spirit-Driven Souls Face That Keep Them From Achieving Their Goals & How To Fix It.
Register at https://mibusiness.lpages.co/risethrive/. It would be lovely to have you live on the call but even if you cannot make it live, register to be offered the replay.
You Will Discover…
✅ Why You Pause When You Know You Should Charge Forward
✅ Why you never seem to break past a certain income limit, regardless of how hard you work
✅ Why you feel overwhelmed, stressed out and a low level sadness most of the time
✅ How to break free from all of the above
✅ How to, very deliberately, create your TRUE DESIGN life.
It will last about 30-45 minutes with a time for questions and answers (or you can send them to me in advance of the call, if you are unable to attend or do not wish to be identified live on the call – Just hit reply – Anything goes.)
The recording will be available only to those who register.
Much Amazing Love