Even Disney is buying into the ‘girls like bad boys’ premise, as Flynn Ryder (Real Name -Eugene) wins the heart of the princess Rapunzel in Tangled, their latest Disney Princess movie.  He is a thief condemned to death for serial thievery but the love of a good woman changes his horizons and he changes his ways.  He is willing to sacrifice his life to save the woman he loves.  Yes, I was weeping at this point in the movie!  Is every bad boy like this though?

To continue on from last week’s thoughts on the ‘why do girls like bad boys‘ issue for women.  This week in the UK, a story has been all over the news.  A story about a woman, Tina Nash, whose life has now been changed forever by a guy called Shane Jenkin.  They are both around my age and the lady has lost her eyesight completely to this ‘bad boy’

Read the story for yourself here.

Can you imagine that?  This is one of the worst case scenarios that can happen when women choose to stay together with a guy who is not good for them.  Is she alone in this respect?  No.  Like many women before her, she thought she could change him.

Well, unfortunately it did not work out that way.  He changed her.

What makes girls like bad boys?

This is not unusual.  We women are maternal, whether we have children or not.  There is a part of us that wants to help bring about a change in other people.  We see the wounded and the broken and we want to help.  Some of us have a more developed sense of responsibility but innately there is always a desire to help.  We feel that, with enough love and attention, anyone or anything can be made better.

Is it true?

Unfortunately not!  We can never make anyone do something they have not chosen for themselves.  It might work temporarily but at some point unless it becomes something the other person chooses to do then we are fighting a losing battle that may blow up in our faces.

Was it worth it for Tina Nash?  I doubt it. Are any of us immune to this?  I do not think so.  I have seen innumerable people, strong women, doing things for their partner that would once have seemed impossible.  Being a part of a relationship, to a certain extent, demands that we change in order to live and love another person.  The hope is that the person we choose to love loves us back and also makes changes to accommodate us.  If they do not, then problems like this can occur.

Men are Jerks?

As Alexis Bledel, a young actress, puts it – For some unknown reason, bad boys draw you in despite the fact that they are jerks.

And they ARE jerks though that side may seem hidden for a bit – at least to you, most of the people around you will know he is a jerk!  Somewhere deep down inside of you, you too will know he is a jerk.  Unfortunately like a lot of women, you may choose to hang on in there, hoping things will improve.

Alas, for Tina, they only got worse.

Listen to your intuition.  Get out of a damaged relationship – Being alone is surely better than being abused. You are worth so much more than any bad boy.