Some days, I start to write and all I feel is blankness.
In fact, to be perfectly honest, all I feel is a fear that whatever I have to say, no one needs to hear and I try to cast it off as nonsense…
I try to do the work and yet, I still feel stifled and so most of the time, I do not try. I do not begin, I keep waiting for inspiration instead of just getting on with it.
And then there are days like today, when I refuse to let that get in the way of saying what I want to say – I just decide to write whatever is going on in my head and let my thoughts take me (and you) wherever they lead.
Fear and love are opposites.
There is no fear in love and there is no love in fear.
When you look through the eyes of fear, all you see is limits…
All you see is reasons why you must keep on living a half of a life…
All you see are a lack of choices, a lack of possibility and a life filled with what you SHOULD do, how you SHOULD do it in order to be accepted, the one way you MUST follow in order to make some money, pay the bills, do all of that stuff.
Instead of seeing all the possibilities around you…
The wonder of how exciting life can be if you let go of the need to keep living the way you always have…
If you let go of all you believe to be true that means you remain stuck and trapped in a life that does not suit you…
You get a choice! You know?!
You are not stuck because you have to be stuck…
You are stuck because you choose to be stuck. You choose to think there is no other way.
You shut down your choices.
And you stay on a course that makes you feel dead inside and honey, that is your choice.
Right now, as I write this, I am sitting in the drawing room of a pretty awesome house in East Devon (Woodhayes House), surrounded by greenery, peace, tranquility and the love of my life (tloml) is here. Not so long ago, we would never have allowed ourselves these luxuries because we would have said – “We cannot afford it.”
And maybe logically we could not, but one thing I know for certain is that if we had kept saying that to everything, every potential opportunity in life, we would never have been able to afford it.
I remember going bankrupt and thinking the world as I know it was over and then three months later, even as I felt depressed, deciding that if we do have to sell our property, we are going to move to rented accommodation in a better place and we did – Not because we could afford it – I was not even working at that point, I was on maternity leave so we paid upfront from the house proceeds.
To explain, because the house was in both of our names, the insolvency service could only take half of the proceeds to pay off my debts so the other half went into paying upfront for a nice house to live in.
It was sooooo much better than anything we had lived in together.
A definite step up, despite my crazy step way down and I needed it in order to refuse the feeling that my current circumstances were all that there was ever going to be for my family and I.
When I finally woke up to the fact that I had to create a different life for real, not just in my dreams, I paid out again another huge sum of money in order to get mentored and coached and to join a mastermind and again, it was an opportunity to step into who I am, rather than stay trapped in who I did not want to be.
And I took it – Scared though I was.
I worried that I really did not have it in me to follow through on anything but I was fed up of pretending and dabbling and being less so I took on the challenge, crazy though it seemed and it paid off.
And more than just paying off in terms of finances…
It was also a mindset thing – I can do whatever I set my mind to…
And a spiritual thing – I am THE creator of my own life experience…
Life does not happen to me, I get a say in how things play out.
You get a say in your life.
You get to choose whether you will open yourself up to living an awesome life or just settle for what you think you have been given.
You get to choose whether you settle for a ‘2 plus 2 is equal to or less than 4’ type of life or a ‘2 plus 2 is always more than 4’ type of life.
YOU ARE A CREATOR!
Not a passenger.
And you always get a choice!
You can live in drama and poverty if you choose but make no mistake, you choose it! or…
You can choose to create abundance all around you.
I know you think no one chooses lack but they do.
You may even be rich in money and still feel lack – I certainly know that feeling, too!
Anyway, from a girl who was too uncertain about what to say today – WELL, 900 words in and yep, I do have something to say 😀
Choose your life experience deliberately.
If you want to make a shed load of money then just start doing whatever you know to do to create it – Don’t listen to the doubt and the weird judgments you have in your head about it because YOU GET TO CHOOSE!
If you want a great relationship, then don’t settle for an OKAY one.
If you want to be in shape, again get to work on creating that reality.
YOU ALWAYS GET TO CHOOSE because YOU ARE A CREATOR!
And if you want to motivated each day to create a life & a business that makes you feel fulfilled, check out the Deliberate Millionaire – It is the place to be for determined creators ready to take on their world and create it the way they want it – Find out more here RosemaryNonnyKnight.com/deliberatemillionaire