You, super capable person, find it easy to take on the problems of every single person you meet, don’t you?
And they, of course, find it pretty easy to request that you help them because they know that if you are asked to help, it is inevitable that you will come through.
And it feels good, doesn’t it?
It feels good to be trusted, to be liked and needed in this way and slowly but surely, you can find yourself doing ‘good deeds’ for everyone else and your calling gets lost as you try to keep everyone happy.
It does become a trap because you find yourself tied to so many people and their needs and you never make progress in the direction of your own things. And the problem is, you convince yourself that it would be selfish to do it any other way.
You do not realize it but you see yourself as everyone’s savior. You see yourself as strong (which is good) and everyone else as weak (NOT so good!). You start to think that unless you do it, no one can. That becomes the reason not to pursue your own agenda and also to feel good about the fact that you are helping these people, because it is good work, right?
Yes, it is good but is it YOUR BEST?
And all the while, there is a little niggle of discontent and it is growing.
It is getting bigger and bigger.
In fact, on some days, you feel resentment but you try to push it back down. And at times, you are literally ANGRY! And it usually gets spewed out on your children or partner.
But you do not see that it is because you are not on the right path for you.
You are on the broad path and it feels like the right path because you are doing all these good things but it is not YOUR path.
And also, and I know you probably do not want to hear this, it is a people-pleasing behavior. And I know, you do not consider yourself a people-pleaser, but right now, you are acting like one.
It is time to break free.
You are not everyone’s savior. They are as capable as you are of saving themselves.
You do not need everyone’s approval. Your people will approve of you and others will not. So what?! That is not why you tap into your calling? Approval or lack of it, cannot be a determining factor.
You are in this because it fulfills you.
You tap into your calling because it is YOUR best life…
And yes, you will serve certain people on the path but not because you have to save them or even that they will love you for it… You do it because it is a part of your calling. It is your path to living a life of meaning and fulfillment. It is only when you do YOUR best work that you feel really truly happy.
And it is not a happiness that is dependent on anyone other than you.
It is a bit of a fine balance.
You do save the world by being your best self but you do not do it to save the world.
Does that make sense?
Every single person on this planet has a role to play when they are living their best life but again, it happens because they are living their best life not because they are trying to save the world.
Are you getting the order right?
Or are you looking too much for the approval of other people? You want them to tell you that you have done something good, you want them to praise you. It makes you feel good in the moment and you get addicted to that feeling of ‘false love’ and it takes you off your path.
And then one day, you wake up and realize just how empty it all is because you have had to deny yourself in order to keep getting their approval and time has now gone by and you are still nowhere near where you had hoped to be by now.
And all because you got addicted to the feeling you got when people acknowledged you for saving their world.
Get back on YOUR path. The accolades you get on your own path are more real, they feel better because you know they are received for being you. You have not had to jump through hoops, you have just been you doing what you would do whatever anyone said about it.
When people love you on your path, you KNOW that they really love the REAL you.
And yet, you do not do it for the accolades, you do it because you must.
You are created for expansion, you are designed to live a certain life, doing certain work and when you do that, you tap into your calling and yes, you help a lot on the way but you mostly, can pat yourself on the back, knowing you have done YOUR work.
And it felt good.
Fight for, deliberately design the life you are born to live
Because you want to