I woke up, connected with Papa and felt led to write something about relationships…
Who am I to write something about relationships?
Yep, I have helped others in theirs as part of my role as prosperity coach/mentor to those who want to make a difference in a bigger, bolder way. Being in loving relationships tend to help them focus and flourish…
Yep, I have been married for 16.5 years pretty happily, against what some people considered to be overwhelming odds…
Yep, I do believe that relationships, intimate or not, are part of a prosperous life…
But seriously, me…? write anything about relationships…?
Anyway, after much dilly-dallying and more procrastinating than is usual for me, I decided to follow the call and write anyway…
1) THE PAST DOES NOT NEED TO AFFECT THE PRESENT
I know you have been hurt before. Even I, in my 16.5 year old intimate relationship have been hurt by others before and it certainly affected my ability to allow love in. However, this person in front of me, is not the same as any of those people. The next person you meet is not the same as those people, honey.
The only way that you will keep recreating the same issues is if you allow the past to infect the present.
You gotta let that shit go.
Yes, you were hurt but you hurt yourself when you carry that hurt like a badge of honour.
Right now, choose to love yourself again because holding on to the past is a form of self-unlove as you refuse to forgive yourself for past mistakes. You tell yourself that it will mean that you never make the same mistake again, except be honest – Are you not seemingly attracting the same people into your life repeatedly? They may have a different name and face but it all ends up the same and you tell yourself it is because everyone is out to get you and there are no good men/women left but it is not true.
Your energy, your vibration is attracting to you what you are sending out.
Love Yourself enough to forgive and let go the past.
Each moment is a new moment to be lived.
If you let it be that.
Leave the past alone. BE here now.
2) RECONNECT WITH SOURCE
For me, the thing that determined whether I married my darling hubby was simply the chat I had with Papa. There were so many voices rising against our marriage and I was pretty young at the time, it scared me. I have always been somewhat rebellious but I certainly did not want to enter a marriage just because I was rebelling against those negative, overpowering voices.
So, at the time, I broke up with the dude as I was not sure what Papa was saying. All the voices were confusing my head and my heart.
it only lasted a few days, because almost as soon as I demonstrated that I was unattached to the outcome and I put my spirituality and my own wellbeing first, I saw clearly a vision of jumping off a cliff and trusting that I would be caught and I knew internally that Papa was telling me it was okay.
So far, so good.
Seek wisdom from within. There may be lots of competing voices, lots of conflicting emotions, go deeper. Seek wisdom within before jumping into a relationship that you hope will last the long term.
3) GET CLEAR IN YOUR MIND THE KIND OF PERSON/LIFE YOU WANT
I add this even though I did not consciously do this. I did not know then what I know now but because of my connection with Source, things have worked out. So, I do consider point 2 to be critical. However, with my current experience, I would suggest that you get pretty darned clear on what you would like in your life, especially if you are older than I was. Simon and I grew together and continue to. You may have done a lot of life alone, you are used to your own company, so what do you feel would work for you? I see too many people in their 30s or above who are so used to their own company that they struggle to fit in a new person and so settle for being alone because they think that what they want cannot work.
And you don’t have to compromise who you are.
It is okay to ask for what you want. There are 7.5 billion people on the planet, you can find your person. Be open though to what you want, coming in a form that you did not expect. Again, POINT 2 – TRUST that the universe knows best.
Make your list and particularly consider how you want it to feel, more than just specifics about outward characteristics.
4) USE YOUR IMAGINATION & TAKE ACTION
As you get clear in your mind on the kind of person you want, begin imagining life with this person. Imagine the feelings of it, the things you would do together. Some things you may simply need to start doing alone or with a friend because hey, if you are going to be doing this stuff together, then maybe the person is there already doing that stuff alone or with a friend. You could meet the person now by opening up your life to more of the activities you think you will be doing then.
Start taking action on the picture.
And make yourself available internally and externally – Get out of your house, for one!
I have already mentioned this but I will mention it again. Be unattached to the outcome and even when you create the relationship you desire, be unattached to it lasting forever.
I used to believe that, and it was more a result of my religious beliefs, that Simon and I HAD TO be together forever and we HAD TO like each other even if we hated each other because we had made a vow before God that we would stay together forever.
I don’t think that anymore.
It feels odd to even type this.
I have released him and instead, I daily choose him.
Which may seem like the same thing but it is not.
I don’t do it because of some vows I made 16.5 years ago. Each day, I deliberately design my life and I choose to have him in it, if he is willing. If for whatever reason, we decided to part, I would still be ok. Yes, it would hurt but I am ok. I do not own him and he does not own me. We choose each other in each moment or we don’t.
Do you get what I am saying?
Non-attachment is a hard one when you want something desperately. However, desperation and attachment make people settle for less than their best life. Always know you do not need anything all that desperately – You are sufficient in yourself – Powerful as you are, created in the image and likeness of the Divine, you are never alone. So relax.
Your best is seeking you.
Be happy now, be at peace now and let it in.
Much Amazing Love
Rosemary Nonny Knight
PS – And by the way, watch this video training – facebook.com/RosemaryNonnyKnight/videos/973633609478849/, if you know you are born to make a difference in a bigger, bolder way and you are determined to create the following…